Just try being more tired”—if only it were that simple
By Eli Mercer on
I’ve been dealing with insomnia for years. People keep saying things like, “Oh, just try being more tired,” or “Get a physical job and you’ll fall asleep instantly.” If only it were that easy.
I lie awake at night, exhausted, my brain refusing to shut off. I’ve tried everything: reading, warm baths, meditation, counting sheep but none of it works consistently. It’s not about laziness or lack of effort; my body just doesn’t cooperate.
What makes it worse is the judgment. Friends or coworkers see me struggling to function the next day and assume I just didn’t “push myself enough” to sleep. But insomnia isn’t a choice. It’s your mind and body being out of sync, and it’s exhausting in every sense, physically, mentally, emotionally.
Some nights I finally drift off at 3 a.m., only to wake an hour later. Some mornings I crawl out of bed, feeling like I’ve run a marathon while standing still. And yet, I keep trying tracking sleep, adjusting routines, talking to doctors, experimenting with what helps even a little.