Rejected 100 Times? Look at the Pattern

A guy I know recently told me he'd been rejected so many times that he'd stopped believing he'd ever find a relationship. Most women gave him some version of the same answer: "You're a nice guy, but I don't see you that way." He started wondering what was wrong with him. I told him that being rejected doesn't automatically mean you're unattractive, boring, or unworthy of love. Sometimes two people simply don't feel the chemistry. But if you're getting rejected over and over again, it's worth looking at the pattern instead of blaming yourself or blaming women. Are you approaching people you actually have something in common with? Are you putting yourself in situations where people can get to know you naturally? Are you genuinely interested in the women you're approaching, or are you mainly looking for someone you find attractive and hoping she'll like you back? I'd also question whether you're putting too much pressure on every interaction. If every woman you talk to immediately becomes a potential girlfriend, dating can start feeling like an interview instead of two people getting to know each other. And I wouldn't tell him to simply "lower his standards." Date someone you're attracted to. Just don't assume attraction only comes in one particular package. Sometimes we have a very narrow picture of our ideal partner and completely overlook people we'd actually have great chemistry with. Most importantly, don't let rejection turn into resentment. Nobody owes you attraction because you're kind, successful, funny, or respectful. Those qualities matter, but romantic interest still has to be mutual. If you've been rejected repeatedly, use it as information. Improve what you can control, meet different kinds of people, work on your confidence, and keep building a life that doesn't depend on whether someone says yes to a date. The goal isn't to convince someone to choose you. It's to become someone who is comfortable enough with himself that when the right person comes along, neither of you has to be convinced.